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Why Black People Pick on Each Other

7/8/2013

1 Comment

 
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As critical commentary from within the black community regarding the demeanor, speech and physical appearance of Rachel Jeantel, a witness in the George Zimmerman murder trial, continue to roll in, “why are blacks divided and always pick on each other?” keeps being asked. The issue of “in-fighting” isn’t exclusive to blacks or African-Americans. It’s an element seen in all socially oppressed groups or communities that are fiercely discriminated against (ex. women, the poor, racial minorities, and homosexuals). Isolation and prejudice are very powerful tools used by those in dominant social control to keep others separated and suppressed. To illustrate how in-fighting begins among an out-casted group, I’m going to use the example of a school yard: something most people can relate to.

Let’s say at a school of 800 students, 700 are tall, skinny, blonde and middle-class, and 100 are short, stocky, brunette and poor. The 700 are obviously the dominant. The 700 reject the 100 because they look different and think they’re less-than because they cannot afford the same lifestyle. It’s emotionally communicated to the 100 that being short, stocky, brunette and poor are negative traits, and they begin to have low self-esteem and self-resentment. Self-resentment leads them to dislike, bash and identify flaws in their own kind because they represent what they wish they weren’t. Parts of the 100 try to lose weight and dye their hair to become more acceptable to the 700; these 100 are either viewed by their own as traitors or put on a pedal-stool for more closely resembling the 700. Those who are accepted (or tolerated, rather) by the 700 increase their hatred towards the rest of the 100 to remain in the circle. Those 100 who don’t care to be accepted by the 700 embrace who they are, but create standards and expectations as to what 100-ness means. Others who don’t meet the criteria for “real 100-ness” are deemed “not 100-enough” and ostracized. They now don’t fit in anywhere; 700’s hate them for being 100, and some 100’s hate them for not being “100-enough.” The 100’s are now a group of students at odds.

Social classes and categories are not evil within themselves, nor are differences. Excluding and despising others based on differences is what creates problems. For populations on the losing end of social hierarchies, it automatically creates a hostile environment of competition, jealousy, poor self-concept and “in-fighting.” My father once described black people as crabs in a bucket. Crabs crawl over each other, trying to get up the wall and out of the bucket. In the process of going up the wall, they often pull those further along down. Incidentally, they drop too and have to start all over. Even though many African-Americans (and other oppressed groups) are very aware of how centuries of prejudice, injustice and discrimination have affected relations within, it’s hard to undo what’s been psychologically learned; especially when racism is still such an impacting force. We constantly perpetuate the lies and stereotypes we’ve been taught about ourselves to each other and the world. In the case of Rachel Jeantel, we passed on the lesson-lie that dark skin is hideous and made of fun of her looks. On a personal note, through most of grade-school, I was that “100” who didn’t fit in anywhere. White kids either dismissed me or constantly highlighted my race, while black kids measured my “blackness.” I was “white” because I liked pop and rock music and wasn’t raised in the inner-city.

Again, this is a behavior pattern seen in all oppressed populations. One of my friends complained that in her workplace, the women are always secretly gossiping about one another and they try to stunt each other’s success. A higher-level executive admitted to her “They’ll [men] allow only so many spots for women to take charge. If you don’t eliminate your competition, you won’t make it.” Actress Gabrielle Union said in a recent interview that she was a “mean girl” who cut other black actresses down until she realized their “shine” didn’t dim her own, but propelled it. Another friend, who’s Latina, said she doesn’t like to socialize with other Latinos because of their dissension. I then asked “Aren’t you contributing to the separation if you shun them?” Although internal backbiting is frustrating (to say the least), we must not give up on our own and assist the division. As members of socially subordinate, “outsider” communities, to interfere with the effects of discrimination, we must constantly hold each other-and ourselves-accountable. Think before you speak and act. Analyze your biases and train of thought. Don’t believe the stereotypes and don’t live them out. Call those around you out when they say and do divisive things. It’s all easier said than done, but a conscious effort made yields results.

1 Comment

The Religious Protesting of Homosexuality 

7/29/2012

9 Comments

 
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When opposing homosexuality, some in the Christian faith use rather extreme and contemptuous tactics. Use of these tactics have resulted in a deep, ferocious social divide, violence, a negative stigmatization of Christians and the spread of stereotypes about the LGBT community (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender). For some of those who believe that homosexuality is a sin denounced by God, they think they’re supposed to angrily attack the concept, when the bible teaches of no such approach. The following article was written by Lasheena Allgood, contributing writer.

There are a lot of opinions and beliefs that are colliding in today’s society. As a true Christian, you want to be able to stand up for what you believe the Bible says in order to please God and show His love to the world. Some have success at living this out, while others display a self-righteous judgment, often accompanied by ignorance.  Jesus gave us two things to live by: love God and love your neighbor as yourself (Mark 12:30-32). In Paul’s 2nd letter to Timothy, he instructs us to “Keep reminding God’s people of these things…Warn them before God against quarreling about words; it is of no value and only ruins those who listen. Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth. Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly (2 Timothy 2:14-16)”.

We find ourselves “boldly” standing for what we “heard” is right, when we haven’t studied what the Bible has to say on a topic, nor have we studied how to approach people. We waste a lot of time arguing. 2 Timothy 2:23-25 reads, “Don’t have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome, but must be kind to everyone and able to teach, not resentful. Opponents must be gently instructed, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth…”

A lot of people think that showing love and compassion towards someone with another sexual preference would mean that they’re compromising their own personal beliefs on the issue and agreeing with the person. There is a big difference between compromise and peaceful tolerance. As the passage in 2 Timothy illustrated, you can let a person know in a loving manner when you believe something is wrong without saying you agree with them. Before you confront someone on ANY issue, check your motives. Check your heart. Are you talking to them with the proverbial “picket sign” of judgment waving at their heads, or are you taking time to understand their plight? You should always try to gain understanding of a person’s heart and seek to confront them with God’s love and compassion in mind. If this is an issue you believe will truly put their lives in danger, it would be wrong not to tell them about it. However, confronting them in any sort of judgmental tone without truly seeking that person’s benefit makes your words and actions fruitless and those of a bigot. What is the purpose of standing in opposition to another’s actions or life without your desire to truly help them? It’s a necessary thing to take a stand for what you believe is right. However, the next time you wish to take that stand and confront someone, remember what God has told us about how to approach people with the correct words and motives. God will do the rest.-L.A.

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Compromising or correctly following the Bible?
J.Says on the topic: I think part of the reason why some respond so aggressively, and sometimes violently, to homosexuals or homosexuality is because of their own personal disgust, fear or misunderstanding of the concept, NOT because of their faith. In some cases, faith is a tool used to justify behavior versus being the cause of it. Some could be atheists tomorrow and they would STILL behave the same way. Underneath all that doctrine and preaching is a deep hatred for homosexuals that is completely independent of faith and God. What angers me is that they won’t own up to that; spewing their hatred in the name of God and using Him as a scapegoat. Even if you believe it to be true that God does not condone homosexuality, it doesn’t require spiteful comments, harassment, humiliation and violence.

Nowhere in the Bible does God or Jesus designate violence and abhorrence as the proper way to handle those believed to be “sinful.” If it’s really about faith, the focus would be on the religion as a whole and what God can offer an individual. A picket sign would read “Here’s what this faith can do for you” versus “God hates you and doesn’t want you here.” Isn’t the goal to bring people to the faith? Those who act in hatred are defeating their own so-called “purpose.” I was once told that I shouldn’t be friends with those who are LGBT because I am a Christian. How am I supposed to bring others to the faith and show my “Christ-like example” if I’m not acquainted with them? I don’t know where some in the religion get the idea that we can profoundly reach people at an arms-length distance. Besides, Christian or not, I’m going to be friends with ANYONE I find things in common with that will treat me well and deliver as a peer.

On the subject of gay marriage & Christianity, I’m a firm believer in separation of church and state. This country is religiously diverse and to design laws based on ANY faith would alienate, disregard and disrespect those outside of said religion. Additionally, I think we have to be careful about what socially we allow the government to deem illegal. Not long ago, interracial marriage was illegal. If we give our legislators that kind of power, anyone they consider socially inappropriate, for any reason, could be at their feet. *drops the mic*

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9 Comments

People Are 70% Evil, 30% Good

11/3/2011

3 Comments

 
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Just last week, I wrote an article about how some people use social media, like Twitter, to bully and be cruel to others (http://bit.ly/usEAjA).  Last week, I saw someone tweet “Happy Birthday @Ciara; you’re still a flop, though.” By putting “@Ciara,” this person intended for the R&B singer, Ciara, to see their condescending message. Appalled yet again by intentional malice and hoping to encourage at least one person to be kinder, I responded “That was mean and I hope Ciara doesn’t see this. If someone did that to Beyonce` (the person was a fan of hers), you’d be livid.” Nonchalantly, the person said “You mad? Oh.” I said “YES, because people do the EXACT same thing to her (Beyonce`). Unnecessary negativity is the reason why people abuse drugs and commit suicide.” With yet another unremorseful reply, I said “Clinging on to negativity. You don’t even care that your actions could hurt someone’s feelings.” They then said “I don’t. But you can stay pressed as I block your bitch ass.”

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Children don't share & love by default.
This exchange just further fueled a belief that I have. I believe that human beings are 70% selfish/evil and 30% selfless/good. From the beginning, our automatic response as humans is not to be selfless/good; it’s the opposite. Small children: you have to TEACH them to share. They don’t do that on their own. If you believe in the biblical story of Adam & Eve, they could’ve easily just followed the rules and not eat the forbidden fruit, but guess what…they did. And it didn’t take much for the good ole’ serpent to convince Eve to bite, either. People always say that it’s hard to do the right thing all the time. Why is it so hard? If we were more good than we are evil, then doing “the right thing” would be a piece of cake. We spend thousands of dollars trying to regulate and control man’s evil with laws, law enforcement and court systems, but laws don’t cease man’s incessant evil nature and law enforcement systems are corrupt within themselves. Daily I see examples, like the Twitter story, where people go out of their way to mean and negative. My friend, whose homosexual, sees hateful comments on his YouTube wall on a regular basis. It’s one thing for someone to take issue with homosexuality and another to tell someone they should be beaten, castrated and shot by a firing squad; especially when you didn’t have to comment at all.

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Why is it a difficult choice, Homer?
One might say “Well, what about all the do-gooders, philanthropists and humanitarians?” These people contribute positively to society in part because of their potential for good (which is 30% in my theory), but their efforts are centrally the result of selfish motives. There is no such thing as altruism. Mother Teresa, a catholic nun famously known for her humanitarian work with the ailing and homeless, ministered to those people because she felt it was her duty as a heaven-seeking servant to God. John Walsh, the host of “America’s Most Wanted,” stated that he became an anti-crime activist after his son was murdered. If not for the loss of his child, would he have been involved with “AMW,” which assisted in the arrest of 1,000 criminals? Both Mother Teresa and John Walsh had something to gain with their “selfless” efforts. Like Walsh, most advocates and activists are motivated by their personal connection to those they support, or there’s something in their background that lead them to their activism. Beyond that, simple good-doing, such as letting someone know they’ve dropped $20, is done because it makes us feel like we’re kind, productive citizens and, in public, it’s more socially acceptable to do nice things.  Even my attempt to reform that mean Twitter user was based in selfishness. I hate it when people do similar things to Beyonce` and despise the concept of bullying in general because I was bullied. I might not have cared about mean tweets, otherwise. As for what we give emotionally and tangibly to our loved ones, we only give because we expect reciprocation in exchange-or else we wouldn’t distance ourselves from those who don’t return the favor. There’s also no such thing as unconditional love, but that’s another post for another day.  So kids, the moral to my story is that when comes time to choose between right and wrong, we choose wrong. If we choose right, we have an ulterior motive. That’s just my theory. Not gospel. What do you think?

3 Comments

Social Subordinates CAN'T Be Great

9/26/2011

3 Comments

 
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A friend of mine was telling me about a man who complained that Beyonce’s music, in the midst of strongly empowering women, didn’t make him feel like he was “wanted and needed” and described the ferocity of her message as “thrown at my face” and male bashing. This infuriated me. This was the 1,000th time I’ve heard a man accuse Beyonce` of male bashing and criticize her music because it proposes ONLY a female perspective. This man and others are under the mistaken impression that feministic messages have something to do with them, be it bashing or otherwise (Cue Carly Simon’s “You’re So Vain...I Bet You Think This Song is About You”). Feminism and/or female empowerment is NOT about ridiculing men. It’s NOT about men AT ALL. In short, it’s about encouraging women to do what’s best for their well-being and success and to pursue justice in the face of discrimination. I’m sorry your feel disadvantaged because Beyonce` is so busy trying to cater to women, that she doesn’t write songs that make you feel “wanted and needed;” she isn’t for you to begin with. She’s for us. Women. For us by us.

This man’s reaction to Beyonce’s feministic messages is a part of the selfish, egocentric thinking that comes with being a “social dominant” and not a “social subordinate” (the central topic of this article). A “social subordinate” is someone who is a part of a community plagued by social injustice (ex. the poor, the disabled, homosexuals, racial minorities, non-Christians/Catholics, women). Social dominants, although often being the facilitators of injustice (either overtly or covertly), sometimes fail to realize that they’re more privileged. Living daily in an advantaged world among fellow social dominants, feeds into the illusion that social adversity is almost non-existent. When coming across material that’s in support of only social subordinates, (ex. Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way” or James Brown’s “Say it Loud, I’m Black & I’m Proud”), social dominants feel left-out and discriminated against, crying foul and claiming that there is no such material for them. This reaction stems from both egotism and a presumed aloofness of their privilege. Egotism, because in their advantaged experience, they’re used to being catered to and respond negatively to anything that excludes them. Privilege aloofness, because they don’t see that most material and support is already in their favor. For example, a Caucasian peer of mine purported that the existence of BET (Black Entertainment Television) was racist and if there was a “White Entertainment Television” there would be an uproar. Aloof to her privilege as a member of the dominant race, she failed to understand that racial minorities are still severely underrepresented in mainstream television, giving reason for a channel like BET to exist. Outside of channels like BET and TV One, everything else IS white entertainment television. Hispanics, Asians and other racial minorities are even further underrepresented.

There wouldn’t be a need for a “Born This Way” if the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender) community wasn’t prosecuted and ridiculed. There wouldn’t be a need for Beyonce` to remind women that they can “Run the World” if they already felt like they could. It angers me when social dominants complain about supports for social subordinates, as if they don’t already have enough advantages. Social subordinates just can’t be great.

3 Comments

Be a Ballsy Bigot

6/10/2011

7 Comments

 
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It used to upset me when politicians say bigoted or hateful things about various groups of people, but now I can appreciate blatantly prejudice remarks, because at least I know where that specific politician stands. When politicians try to disguise or sugarcoat their biased views, I think it’s that much more insulting because now you’re lying, trying to deceive people and cowardly hiding your opinion.

Tennessee Governor Bill Haslam signed a law that would prohibit local governments from creating their own anti-discrimination laws. This decision came after the city of Nashville formed an ordinance that restricts employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity. Haslam’s spokesman, David Smith, told “The Tennessean”: “Through the legislative process, (Haslam) expressed concerns about the state telling local governments what to do, but he also had concerns about local governments telling businesses what to do, especially the potential burden on small businesses…Ultimately, he felt the Metro ordinance went further than federal law in regulating business policies.” 

Not only was Haslam too much of a coward to address “The Tennessean” himself, he hid his prejudice against the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender) community under the guise of protecting businesses from government. He’s concerned about “local government telling businesses what to do?” Really? There are multiple state laws that “tell businesses what to do,” including not discriminating based on sex and race, among other things. Why have anti-discrimination laws for one group, but not another? Oh, I remember, because Haslam is prejudice against the LGBT community. I would slightly respect Haslam more if had a just came out and said “I think businesses should be able to not hire a homo if they don’t want to.” Be ballsy with your homophobia, please.

On another note, when it comes to LGBT employment discrimination, we have slightly bigger fish to fry as a culture. As it currently stands, there are no nationwide anti-discrimination employment laws for this community. That means, unless you have an awesome lawyer and a supportive court, you’re going to have a hard time obtaining damages as a victim. For all of those bigots out there, that fact is a gift. For those who believe in human rights, support the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA), a circulating congress bill that has yet to pass. 

7 Comments

Hateful and Evil

4/9/2011

1 Comment

 
My latest videoblog.
Humans will go to extreme lengths to spread hate. Are humans more selfish/evil than they are selfless/good? What do you think?
1 Comment
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